You want to do what with me? Photo by Randy Stern

You thought it would never end. Well…here it is – the final “Five Favorites” posting for the summer of 2010. To make things more interesting, instead of “favorites,” I’d like to divulge some “fantasies.”

Before anyone’s mind dives into the gutter, the “fantasies” I’m talking about are automotive. They do lack orgasmic reactions, which are supplanted by bliss and joy – if accomplished, of course.

What do I mean by “fantasies?” Have you ever dreamt of taking a trip somewhere to fulfill the one thing you always wanted to do on your bucket list? For example: Deep sea snorkeling in the Great Barrier Reef, hiking up Kilimanjaro, or driving through the Stelvio Pass. There may be some pedestrian fantasies as well – such as going to New York for the weekend.

For me, an automotive fantasy involves a place, an automobile and something I’ve been chicken to do. So, I decided that these fantasies should have minimal barriers. Long drives? If they’re handled with care, why not! Speed? Of course, why not! Machinery? Hmmm…as long as it’s comfortable or appropriate for the job at hand.

Now, here’s what dreams are made of…

A LAP – SOMEWHERE: Granted, there is a fear of me driving beyond 90MPH, especially when there are state troopers around. Believe me, I’ve pushed cars beyond 90 before – on Interstate 5 between Bakersfield and Tracy. Still, it’s nothing quite like taking a lap on a raceway. I did inquire a couple of times on two separate tracks, but chickened out. Not to mention track fees are pretty dear to me right now. The closest track I can think of to accomplish this feat is Brainerd International Raceway – just a couple of hours from the Twin Cities. Granted, they have racing vehicles available, but for a guy who can’t manage a clutch, they only have Ford Crown Victoria Police Interceptors available. Um…I have a better idea. How about a Hyundai Genesis Coupe 3.8 Track model with the 6-speed automatic gearbox? As proven before, my preferred coupe, the Dodge Challenger, is not much of a curve master, so I would have to yield to a more track-proven machine with 300-plus horses driving the rear wheels. There are two configurations at BIR – one for more sports car racing and the other for more NASCAR set-ups. I would run a lap on both in the Genesis Coupe! There are other tracks in the Midwest I could tackle – Elkhart Lake in Wisconsin is the closest to BIR’s road course set-up. Heck, Elkhart is more hardcore compared to BIR…hmmm…decisions!

THAT BASEBALL TOUR… How to combine my two biggest loves into one special trip? I’ve always dreamt of hitting the road and stopping at ballparks across the country (or continent) that would give me a better perspective of the country I still need to explore deeper. Though I addressed it in The Heirloom, I took a step back and wondered “could I do better than what I posted already on that blog?” To do it right, I would have to string a route together that includes major and minor league parks. In some cases, a loop would suffice – or, rather a one-way trip. If I began here in Minneapolis-St. Paul, I would try for running down to Kansas City and taking it from there. Having attempted to go to Kauffman Stadium a few times over the years, the focus would be fulfilling that void. From there, it would be a scramble to forge a solid road trip to see some minor league action elsewhere in the heart of this country. Not to fear – that’s why a lot of research comes into play with the focal point being Kansas City. The car would be simple – since it will only be me going. There are a few choices, but a 2011 Hyundai Sonata GLS works well. It has a powerful engine, connected to a nice automatic gearbox and is equipped with XM radio to catch all the major league action on the road. My first leg would be the 6-7 hour shot down to Kansas City – simply, go for it. A couple of nights in KC would work with a Royals game and a visit to the Negro Leagues museum. From there, I would venture into unchartered waters – deep into Missouri towards Arkansas. There will be stops along the way, such as Springdale, Arkansas for the Arvest Ballpark and the Naturals, and in Little Rock for the Travelers at Dickey-Stevens Ballpark. While in Little Rock, I will have to stop at the Bill Clinton Library. Turning east, my next stop will be Memphis and AutoZone Park with the Redbirds on tap, then turning back north to St. Louis and the Cardinals at Busch Stadium. To round out the trip, I would jump into Illinois with a stop in Peoria then head home via the Quad Cities and Cedar Rapids, Iowa. All three stops have Midwest League teams to visit: The Peoria Chiefs, Quad Cities Bandits and Cedar Rapids Kernels. Keep in mind this is just one routing. I can think of many different ones either starting from home or flying into another city and starting there. Or, I could do a one-way shot, drop the car at a finish point and fly home.

PICK YOUR FRIENDS, GO SOMEWHERE! Most of the trips I’ve taken over the years have been solo. On the occasion I’ve had others in the car, it was fun! Going back-and-forth to Duluth had been the most frequent road trip involving others in an automobile. Now, there’s no foreseeable reason to go up to the Twin Ports area. Not unless you want to keep on going further on Highway 61 or out towards the Upper Peninsula of Michigan. The plan is simple: Get a group of friends who get along very well – three is a good round number – and a vehicle that would carry them (and, me) comfortably. Not to mention a vehicle they can drive whenever I’m tired. The first thing people would probably think of is a minivan. After driving a Chrysler Town & Country in the past several months, as ideal as it is for passengers, it’s not for me. My preference is a SUV or crossover, since I have a lot more confidence driving these vehicles instead of a minivan. Probably the best vehicle I can think of that can give everyone the best of both worlds would be the Chevrolet Traverse 1LT, equipped with the 3.6litre V6 connected to a 6-speed automatic gearbox and all-wheel-drive. Perhaps the only option I see adding is the rear seat entertainment system, which includes screens in the headrests connected to a DVD player. You may never know how bored they might get back there. Nonetheless, the drive would be towards the U.P. – an adventure in itself. After twisting and turning through the farmlands and the woods, the reward is the lakeshore. It’s bucolic towns such as Houghton and Marquette with an opportunity to touch the other side of the peninsula facing Lake Michigan. It’s about sharing cabins or a suite with the four of us enjoying a lovely spring or fall in a place innocent and charming. Of course, I have to pick my friends wisely – ones that would love such a trip. Otherwise, it’s the four of us heading to Chicago…on second thought – I like the U.P. idea better!

A GRAND TOUR OF EUROPE: Consider my Five Favorite automobiles you can’t get on these shores (unless you played the Gray Market in the 1980s), and think of how I could enjoy any of the ones in the Old World on their turf. Think of the challenge of keeping beyond 70MPH while crossing borders and meeting an Alp or two on the way. Though, my Grand Tour would have ulterior motives (back to orgasmic fantasies for a moment). But, how would I pull this off – and in what automobile? Unfortunately, it can’t be German, North American or Asian. It sounds like a job for the Skoda Superb Elegance 2.0 TDI with a 6-speed DSG gearbox – not exactly a head-turner, but fine enough to satisfy my right foot – and have an extended fuel range, to boot! I would collect the Superb in Prague since the car is built nearby. From there, it’s a hop into Germany and a few stops, including a blessing at the gates of Nurburging and museum tours for Volkswagen Group in Wolfsburg, Mercedes-Benz and Porsche in Stuttgart. Eventually, I would stop in the Alsace, where my mom’s family originally came from, before heading up into the Benelux countries. To honor my Minnesota home, a venture up to Scandinavia with stops at Goteborg for Volvo and Trollhattan for Saab, along with possible stops in Oslo and Helsinki. Of course, I realize that it would over 13 hours from Amsterdam to Stockholm – and that could be tricky to manage, unless I overnight it in Copenhagen to break up the journey. My last run would be a beeline down to the Mediterranean Sea via Germany, France (with a stop to see a former co-worker in Grenoble) into Spain with Barcelona as my final stop. Skoda can pick up the car there while I enjoy the sun and men at Sitges. Now, that’s a Grand Tour! Then again, would it be better if I flew and took the train?

TAMING THE AUSTRALIAN HIGHWAYS: Though there will be no Outbacks to tackle, there will be plenty of reminders that I am in a place Down Under. There’s plenty of subtlety in their humor and interesting gazes upon an American driving one of their own machines between Brisbane and Melbourne. To do it right, I need a starting point – and a good time of year to do it. Since summer can be as bad as some parts of the States, I’ll do it during their winter (our summer) and start in Melbourne for Southern Hibearnation (that’s a bear run, BTW). The choice wheels would have to be a coin flip between a Ford Falcon G6 with a 4.0litre in-line 6 and an automatic gearbox and the Holden Calais with a familiar 3.6litre V6 connected their automatic gearbox. Holden just released a revised Series II VE Commodore line that includes Flex Fuel capability for the 3.6litre engine – and access to E85 fuels at select Caltex (i.e. Chevron Texaco) fuel stations. After partying it up with the bears in Melbourne, it will be a ten-hour drive on some serious inland highways – after all, this is not a small country by any means! It would mean a late arrival into Sydney, but that’s why you schedule some extra days to check the city out. After exhausting Sydney for what it’s worth, the next step is to drive towards Brisbane. Considering it is 11 hours up there, a halfway stop along the coast is in order. Probably somewhere between Port Macquarie and Coffs Harbor would work for me. Just an evening before reaching Brisbane – where the Ford or Holden is deposited and I spend a few nights carousing. As I mentioned before, I’m not one for long drives – but it appears that in a country where its major cities are no where near as accessible as in this country, the challenge is there for the taking,

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